Tuesday, April 21, 2009

India, This Past Fortnight (V)

Originally published on Nazar on April 20, 2009. And here's a link to another article called 'The Great Indian Soap Opera Generator' that I wrote with a friend for Nazar.

I believe that it has now become necessary for Universities around the world to have a ‘Shoe Throwing 101′ class for Journalism majors. Recently, a reporter called Jarnail Singh threw his shoe at Indian Home Minister, P. Chidambaram, only to miss his intended target. While reading an article about this incident on the BBC website1, I came across this gem: “Correspondents say that the minister is the latest in a prominent line of world leaders who have been subjected to a shoe attack - considered an insult in India.”

Yes, as opposed to England, where throwing a shoe at someone is equivalent to saying “Jolly good!”

The Bharatiya Janata Party’s (BJP) Prime Ministerial Candidate, Mr. L.K. Advani, has challenged the current Prime Minister, Dr. Manmohan Singh, to a debate ahead of the Lok Sabha elections. Dr. Singh had this to say in response, “I am the candidate from the Congress party. Why should I confer the status of an alternative Prime Minister on Advani?”2

So that we can figure out which candidate is bad and which one is worse.

Head of the AIADMK3, Ms. Jayalalitha, when asked about which parties she would align with, said “A good politician never rules out anything”4.

And I thought ‘good politician’ was an oxymoron.

Speaking of morons, a self acclaimed ’social worker’ called Anil Nair filed a police complaint against actor Akshay Kumar and his wife Twinkle Khanna following Kumar’s stint at the Lakme Fashion Week. As a part of the act on the ramp, Twinkle Khanna had unbuttoned Kumar’s jeans and Nair felt that this act was obscene and vulgar.5

Why are there so many Indian social workers with an inner ‘Muthalik’ in them?

Mulayam Singh Yadav of the Samajwadi party, while explaining the reason his party had included ‘non-compulsion of English’ in its manifesto, said, “Decades ago, children used to call their mother ‘Amma’, which later changed to just ‘Maa’. However with influence of English increasing in our daily life, today kids prefer calling their mothers as ‘Mum’ or ‘Mom’. What kind of culture we are getting into? It is because of this cultural degeneration that we emphasised not to make English compulsory.”6

Thanks for the clarification, Mulayam. Henceforth, I’ll just call you an idiot, in a regional language.

Arjun Singh, a veteran Congress politician, was upset when he found out that his children were denied tickets by the Congress party to contest in the Lok Sabha elections. When he was asked if he was slighted by this move by his party, his response was, “I am not slighted. Slighted is a word that somehow does not appeal to me”7.

Slighted doesn’t sound nearly as appealing as nepotism.

Recently, the shooting of a Malayalam movie called ‘Daddy Cool’ was disrupted.8

I was disappointed to find out that the movie’s title had nothing to do with it.

To read more ‘India, This Past Fortnight’, click here.

Footnotes:
1 - http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/business/7987201.stm
2 - http://www.hindu.com/2009/04/14/stories/2009041458040100.htm
3 - AIADMK is a political party in Tamil Nadu
4 - http://www.hindu.com/2009/04/15/stories/2009041556021300.htm
5 - http://www.channelnewsasia.com/stories/entertainment/view/420384/1/.html
6 - http://www.expressindia.com/latest-news/no-ban-on-english-nothing-compulsory-either-mulayam/446713/
7 - http://economictimes.indiatimes.com/News/PoliticsNation/Congress-advises-Arjun-Singh-to-read-Gita/articleshow/4427786.cms
8 - http://www.hindu.com/thehindu/holnus/009200904202021.htm

Photo Courtesy: Al Jazeera EnglishWikipedia

Monday, April 06, 2009

Mi Familia

What do you do when you forget to take with you a picture of your family for a Spanish class assignment?


Show off your kindergarten drawing skills.

Sunday, April 05, 2009

India, This Past Fortnight (IV)

Originally published on Nazar (http://NazarOnline.net) on April 5th. Click here to see it on Nazar (it comes with pictures (which I'm too lazy to put here)).

The star of ground-breaking movies such as Mujhe Kuch Kehna Hai, Khushi and Chup Chup Ke, Kareena Kapoor, recently said “I’d go on a holiday than do a bad film”1.

Donations for the ‘Kareena-Please-Go-On-A-Holiday Fund’ are now being collected.

The soon-to-be released economy car, the Tata Nano, has captured the imagination of Indians of all ages. A 96 year old Indian woman, Homi Vyayarwalla, was quoted as saying, “Given my age and weakness, I need a simple vehicle. The car looks easy to drive and comfortable to travel in, which is what people want in my age”2.

Well, compared to her first car (pictured below), the Nano must be quite a tempting buy.

The Indian Premier League (IPL), touted to be second in importance only to world peace, has been shifted to South Africa. Indian Home Minister, P. Chidambaram, couldn’t guarantee sufficient security arrangements due to the IPL coinciding with India’s general elections. Arun Jaitley, of the Bharatiya Janata Party (BJP), has called this development “shameful”3. He also hit out on the Home Minister, saying “Chidambaram has one and half months left in his hand, so he should concentrate more on his job”.

Mr. Jaitley, looking out for the nation’s security is his job.

The general Lok Sabha elections are fast approaching in India, and as a result, this is the season for WTF lines from men and women masquerading as half-baked politicians. Mulayam Singh Yadav, of the Samajwadi Party, was recently incensed when a District Magistrate canceled the gun licenses of many of his party workers. He said in a rally, “I am not saying anything to you Madam DM, because you are a woman. I respect you because you are a woman. Better behave yourself.”4

Before you jump to any conclusions, he’s insulting her solely out of the respect he has for her womanhood.

The Election Commission in India, responsible for ensuring fairness in the election process, has disallowed the BJP government in Karnataka from distributing free bicycles to school students. Their reason - “students are not voters”5.

Yes, political parties are only allowed to buy the support of those over the age of 18.

It is the time for politicians to bring down their political opponents and BJP senior leader, Venkaiah Naidu, intends to do that in rhyme. He was quoted as saying, “PM presides, madam (Congress President Sonia Gandhi) decides”6, and “Congress assurance has no insurance”7.

It looks like Navjot Singh Sidhu8 has had a lasting impact on the BJP.

There has been a lot of political and public uproar ever since a CD containing a hate speech allegedly made by Varun Gandhi, the BJP candidate from Pilibhit, came to light. Renowned public nuisance and head of the Sri Ram Sena, Pramod Muthalik, has thrown his weight behind Varun Gandhi saying, “He has the guts to speak the truth. Sri Rama Sena would support him. I think every true Hindu would support him”9.

Muthalik, shut up.

To read more ‘India, This Past Fortnight’, click here.

Footnotes:
1 - http://movies.indiatimes.com/Features–Events/Features/Quotable-Quotes-of-the-Week/articleshow/msid-4293719,curpg-9.cms
2 - http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/Vadodara/Nano-enamours-Indias-first-woman-photojournalist/articleshow/4311135.cms
3 - http://cricket.timesofindia.indiatimes.com/Shifting-of-IPL-from-India-is-shameful/articleshow/4306638.cms
4 - http://www.ndtv.com/convergence/ndtv/story.aspx?id=NEWEN20090088612&ch=324200972000PM
5 - http://www.hindu.com/thehindu/holnus/001200903242231.htm
6 - http://www.ndtv.com/convergence/ndtv/story.aspx?id=NEWEN20090088670
7 - http://www.hindu.com/2009/03/25/stories/2009032561011400.htm
8 - Navjot Singh Sidhu is a former Indian Cricketer and television commentator who ran on a BJP ticket in 2004. He was well known for his word-play, commonly known as ‘Sidhuisms’.
9 - http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/Varun-had-the-guts-to-speak-the-truth-Muthalik/articleshow/4310204.cms

Wednesday, April 01, 2009

Test My Research Project

So, I've got a big research project to present in a couple of days and I want to test it out before I make my presentation. Please click here to and follow the instructions. I would greatly appreciate it!