Monday, March 09, 2009

Observations of a Third Year College Student

1. The time to do laundry is determined by the number of pairs of underwear you own.

2. Never ask a college student when they last did their laundry (there is no way they have that many pairs of underwear).

3. You know it's time to ask your room-mate to do the dishes when the stench reaches the bed room.

4. It's never your turn to do the dishes.

5. A shower lasting longer than 5 minutes is a momentous occasion.

6. A shower is an occasion.

7. Never call a person when you can see them on Google Talk (having to hear the other person's voice is over-rated).

8. Never ever text a person unless it's an emergency (email is cheaper).

9. If you see a third year student who does not look tired or even mildly pissed with life, you may assume either
    a) he is smoking something you've heard makes life seem wonderful
    b) he is a Business major

10. If you hear a third year student cribbing, you are allowed to zone out as long as you nod your head in regular intervals.

11. If you see a freshman cribbing, you may knock that kid on the head. Caveat: the kid has to be smaller than you.

12. You are required to act surprised at your 'surprise' birthday party. Even though you knew there was going to be a surprise party. Something's gotta be up when your friends suddenly seem to enjoy your company.

13. You are allowed to be offended if there was no surprise party. Even though you said you didn't want one, multiple times.

14. You can put a :( as your Facebook status message if you did not get any kind of party. Seriously, everyone deserves cake.

15. If you see a FB status message saying 'Person's_name is gay', then that person's got bored friends. And an unattended laptop. Change his computer clock to be one hour slower.

16. A handshake and a smile is the best way to avoid talking to someone.

17. Never stop to talk to someone if all you've got is 'What's up?'.

18. If you hear a Backstreet Boys' song playing from someone's laptop, you can loudly mock them (even though you are singing along in your head).

19. If a Backstreet Boys' song suddenly starts playing from your laptop, you can say 'How did that get in there?' and look around with a bemused smile. It's cool, we all know how it got in there.

20. Saying 'My Bad' absolves you of the bad you did. Really.

14 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hilarious! Well, can imagine how your room will look like after reading your post.
Amas

Ram said...

Whats the f is up with ABCDs and 'My bad'! That's not even correct. I have a guy who bowls 3 wides and then says 'My bad'. People don't shout at him.

RukmaniRam said...

#20 is so so very true!

neon said...

@Ram,

haha, i once had a catch dropped by a fielder who immediately shouted out from the boundary, 'Oh, my bad'. Next ball was a quicker one that went past the keeper for four.

chutney said...

reg #20, Whats with ABCDs and acting African american?
Its so...weird. But amusing.

Zephyr said...

hahaha! i loved this post! totally can relate to it! nice job! :)

arethusa said...

Haha that was funny

Aash Anand said...

OMG. Laundry. Shoot I forgot. :P

#9b: tsk. Business majors.

P.S. Brace yourself for my return to menace the blogosphere following my newly acquired knowledge of things in general.

neon said...

@chutney,

definitely amusing!

@zephyr,

thanks much :)

@aretheusa,

thank you :)

@aash,

please do send me the link so that I can also learn more about things in general

Siddhu said...

God, I sound like an old sod saying this, but what you said reminds me so much of my own uni days.

I remember my mum asking me why on earth I wanted to buy 15 pairs of underwear when in India! :P

slowtumblinglife said...

Hilarious Post..

And not just this one :)

Btw #1 hits the nail on the head!!! reminded me of my college years.. its true even now though..

neon said...

@Sidd,

You stayed in a hostel? I thought you went to Anna

@slowtumblinglife,

Thanks :D

Vishal 'Tommy' Thomas said...

LOL.. :D.. hilarious.. haven't been here in a while.. i see you haven't lost the touch.. :D

maxdavinci said...

ennavo, ellam nalla irundha seri!